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Devious Journal Entry

Journal Entry: Fri Apr 20, 2012, 4:39 PM









Introduction
Hi, and welcome to my deviantART gallery! I'm Jesse Lax, aka AHiLdesigns. I'm a Conceptual Design Artist, currently working as Creative Director for Kwaai Software. I work in a wide variety of mediums, but enjoy the most of my work habits digitally.

My Gallery Art
I've removed my Desktop Wallpapers from the public due to excessive theft, misuse, and plagiarism. I'll be refocusing this gallery to provide only royalty free resources in an effort to continue my want to help the art community.

Use of My Wallpapers
You may not use my existing wallpapers from this account any longer. I understand many of them continue to exist from websites reuploading them. If you've found one at a website other than here, my original rules for use remain: They are only for your personal use and may not be altered, sold, or otherwise used in a public venue.

Commission, Licensing, & General Inquiry Contact
For any and all queries on commercial license pricing to sell my work, to arrange professional commissions, or to generally inquire about any related business topic, I'd like to direct you to my agent, Miss Campbell. Her email: kcampbell731@gmail.com.



Life in 2014
My life is resonating happiness! If things get anymore awesome my face might explode. Having a splendid time with my best-friend/fiancee enjoying life and each other on a daily basis. Laughing and loving has never been so perfect.

In other news: Along with my business partners, I'm fully focused on growing our social gaming business, Kwaai Software. Apart from a couple of collaborations with KariAnnLax and some guest appearances on e-comics and strips, my personal art has taken a backseat to professional art. It's a decision I'm very happy with.

I'm still obsessed with nearly all forms of geekery - comics, collectables, books, Doctor Who, etc. Our lovely cats have grown into distinct little personalities an are having a great time. I spend a ton of time on Facebook due to work... shoot me a note if we're not friends there already.

Hope you all are doing well!

Be Seeing You!
-Jesse



Devious Journal Entry

Tue Jul 12, 2011, 11:53 AM


Death Can Shiny 1UP by ItchyBarracuda ‹‹Welcome to My Gallery!››

>>>>~--~-- | † | --~--~<<<<


Introduction
Hi, and welcome to my deviantART gallery! I'm Jesse, aka AHiLdesigns. I'm a Conceptual Design Artist, currently working as Creative Director for Kwaai Software LLC. As well as this I'm also involved in a volunteer side-project with The Doctor Who Reprint Society. Where Kwaai Software endeavors to publish uniquely addictive games on various social networking platforms and the mobile arenas, the Reprint Society's focus is purely in the realm of literature as it pertains to the wonderful world of Doctor Who.  

My Gallery Art
In my personal time I passionately design, create, and distribute free stuff. I believe in philanthropy, but I also feel like next to the small handful of brilliant work out here in the design-art world, there's a lot of really shitty stuff floating around. So for as much as I love the philanthropy of giving things away, I also am proactively attempting to clean up some of these obscene disfigurements by making sure I'm giving out top-quality utensils. I want people to learn to create and design better! But I also want them to use the best if they're just going to download and use. For these reasons you'll find a solid array of free resources for the world at large to use as they please.

Use of My Wallpapers
Above this, one of my favorite pastimes is creating desktop wallpapers. As well as a testament to my creative skills, these are more for my personal enjoyment. Even so I realize people really like the wallpapers I make and that they're readily available to anyone coming for my resources. To make things clear: I don't intend for my wallpapers to end up in places other than your desktop. They're not stock, they don't belong on your website, or your social networking backgrounds, and they certainly shouldn't be sold on merchandise or any electronic device, in any capacity, for any reason without my express permission!

Commission, Licensing, & General Inquiry Contact
For any and all queries on commercial license pricing to sell my work, to arrange personal commissions, or to generally inquire about any related business topic on your mind, I'd like ot direct you to my agent's email: kcampbell731@gmail.com. She's smart, savvy, professional, honest, easy to talk to, and most importantly handles me and my work very well. I make mention of my agent in this way, because I know there's some people out there not in the professional art industry who might want to contact me... and I don't want you to be nervous about it. I may be a professional, but I'm still a person... so just write, I want to hear from you! :)

Be sure to include "Re: AHiLdesigns <Your Interest Here> Inquiry" or some such thing in your email. You'll get a quicker response.

If you're wondering what my skills are apart from what you see in this gallery, please click AHiL just below my name at the bottom of this journal, where you'll be redirected to my LinkedIn account.



Death Can Shiny 1UP by ItchyBarracuda ‹‹Shtuff››

>>>>~--~-- | † | --~--~<<<<


My Current Wallpaper Hero
Hands down, it's submicron, through and through. If I had kept up with the direction I was heading before landing myself in the professional art world, I'd love to have found myself creating works such as his. This guy's work is amazing, and continue to flourish with each new piece. I wish him all the best and hope he lands somewhere crucial with his work.

On a related note, I've also seen an amazing selection of TobiasRoetsch's work (via his design company, GTGraphics.de) appear in Microsoft's online Windows 7 theme gallery. I was overjoyed (and a bit envious) to see it.

A Word to my Design Friends
Please keep your eye as closely peeled as you can to the Android Marketplace. I've come to see a lot of my own work being sold in phone themes and wallpaper apps. Yours could very well be there too. I've been struggling for their removal. Between the apathy of the thieving, talentless developers and Google's complete lack of response to copyright infringement on their Marketplace.., it's been trying. My advice to you is that if you don't have legal representation to do what I've done and alert any such developer to your massive connections with other top designers. It seems to make them a bit weary and start kissing your ass a bit more. :P

Life in 2012
Things are going great! I'm busier than I've ever been, but the new year has kicked off wonderfully and I'm very excited to see what challenges and conquests come of the year. I don't check in very often here on deviantART, but I do enough to that contacting me here via notes about personal or dA matters is viable. Have been illustrating quite a bit lately, which is quite satisfying to me. It's a medium I thought I'd left behind but turns out to still be holding strong! I've had some advice as of late from some big names (no, I'm not outing them) who've dropped by to give me some advice. It's exciting to make new contacts, but it also gives a great feeling of accomplishment to know my potential is worth taking note of... and that there are people out there finding me.

For downtime I've been breaking up time between X-Files reruns, and have gaming a lot lately with my fiance and some on my own. We're hardcore about co-op games (online and off), and I still can't seem to prevent myself from the spare "OMG" 1-player titles. When we find a title we like, we tend to play the whole series if there's more than one. Some of our & my favorites currently are: Borderlands, L4D, Kane & Lynch, Unreal Tournament 3, Fear 3, Soul Caliber 4, Mortal Kombat, Batman: Arkham City, and Alice: Madness Returns. We're anxiously anticipating Borderlands 2 and Soul Caliber 5 like no one's business. Uhm, chick gamers rule, btw. Mine's the best!

I see a lot of politics in the dA community as of late. This community has been forced into tragic changes, and I've seen some really amazing talent leave because of its politics. I'm not terribly surprised, but I also don't care to get involved. I'd like to openly state that I'm not a deviantART advocate and my involvement with this community only goes so far as the artists I speak to and whatever is the best way to publicize myself and my art. Once upon a time, I was a Gallery Moderator here, and while that's somewhat reflected by my Senior Member status, it only means that once I was inspired to be involved. My vision was soured by the lack of vision by others, and the careless flagrancy of greed and separation from moral values. You don't have to know what that means. Just know I do, and because of it I'm using dA as a webspace in the strictest sense... and that outside of this small monologue I won't be speaking on 'intense internal topics'.

To my old friends here, and new ones I'm to meet... thanks for your inspiration, support, and advice! All of my best, and please drop an email or comment from time to time. it's good to be in touch, even if only casually.


That's that.

Lots of Love & See You Next Time!
-Jesse

AHiL







You are Cordially Invited...

Journal Entry: Thu Sep 17, 2009, 2:44 PM






Death Can Shiny 1UP by ItchyBarracuda ‹‹Cordially Invited! Yes, but Where?››

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To AHiLdesigns facebook page! That's where!
Now you can track my stuff all from one place.

Highlights include:

  • a Discussion Board (where I've already left many resource links to some of my favorite resource sites),

  • Gallery Samples

  • regular Updates to new releases from my places all over the web

  • a Comment Wall

  • Plus more to come soon!


What the hell are you waiting for? Go click the "Become a Fan" button now!


That's that.

See You Soon!
-Jesse

AHiL


</blockquote>







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Possibly I'll Answer the Question. Somehwhat.

Journal Entry: Tue Aug 18, 2009, 10:29 AM






Death Can Shiny 1UP by ItchyBarracuda ‹‹How I Do What I Do, Pt. 1››

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I get asked (quite repeatedly) how I attain the final result to my works using often times no stock. I'm actually surprised how many times this question still comes up on a desktop or design piece. I've never answered the question outright, because I feel like it's something of an "AHiL mystery", and I do like a good intrigue.

However, I'm REALLY bored today, so I'm going to tell a bit about how I work a piece. Possibly. Well, probably. okay, possibly probably. Perhaps it's more like: possibly I'll probably somewhat maybe answer the question. Oh, honestly I'm sure I'll talk more about my feelings and thoughts on elements of creating art---but thats close enough, isn't it??

I'm trying to think of the best way to do this. Uhm... let's try it as a sort of self-interview. Yes?
K. Here we go.

1. What are the Grounding Blocks of my Design and Desktop Art?
It's fair to say my work wholly depends on the use of Custom Shapes, Hi-res Photographical Textures, Photographical Light Play, Hi-res Repeating Tile Patterns, and especially Photoshop's Blending Options.  In the last two years I've avoided everything else like the plague.

Attempting to stray from brushes, Filters, Plug-ins, and other people's PSD resources, may seem as though I've limited myself. I don't feel that way at all, and I don't think my art looks that way. In fact, I enjoy the challenge and I find myself constantly experimenting to invent a new means to achieve a desired look. I would recommend it to anyone, actually.


2. When I use stock, what stock do I prefer?
I try my hardest not to use it. It's a bit of a pet peeve, and I annoy myself with being convenienced by it.
The few circumstances I do, however, are: Because I don't like to waste time, I'll use photographs of light play to warp or liquify, and then blend to create a beautiful display of motion or intense glow. I should add that I don't use light simply to have light. I use it because it's another way to communicate form on darker colors where a normal "line" will not work. Then I make it as pretty as I can (since it's there) using Blending Options.

Perhaps the only large place where stock becomes very important to me is in a piece containing any grunge elements, whereby I absolutely do not hesitate to find the coolest stock texture I can. Usually this is my own, but I have and do use quite a bit from sxc.hu, cgtextures, and right here at dA. These become mostly background work, and I'll usually blend quite a few textures together to bring something new.


3. Do I use the Pen tool?
Very seldom, in fact. Most of my very popular friends use it and nothing else. I can see why, too! It gives you the most control you can have if you're apt to making a one of a kind design. There's no other way to do it for some, really. I find it very tedious and complicated though. When I do use the pen tool, it's only to achieve a certain custom shape I don't have already in my catalog, and intend to use again for some other purpose.


4. How Would I Define My Photoshop Skill Level?
I wouldn't, because I'm honestly not all that knowledgeable with the most of what photoshop can do. I've taught myself the program and still learn new things every day. I suppose if i had to, I'd consider myself a novice. however, I do feel like I have a bit of a specialization in the Blending Options department, only out of time served.

My habit is to work very simply in Photshop. I never use masks, I always folder my layers, I don't grid or align outside of my natural eye... nothing fancy. It's all just layers of shapes and lots of blending options. Even my few manips are done by cutting everything with the eraser tool by hand, and then I run back to my beloved blending options any chance I get.


5. Do I Think My Habits Make My work Different?
No, and I don't think anyone should worry about this. You can do the same thing six different ways in Photoshop. It's that formidable. I think I've maintained a very different style to my art because I've adamantly strived to do so. I'm always looking at others artists, popular and not, and making notes which directions have been done and trying to think of those that haven't. By this time in the life of art, it's usually easiest just to fall to abstract art---but doing so with design, this becomes as complicated as it does convoluted. I think that's why I like it. A sort of fusing of the two very different worlds.


Death Can Shiny 1UP by ItchyBarracuda ‹‹How I Do What I Do, Pt. 2››

>>>>~--~-- | † | --~--~<<<<


6. Where do Ideas like "Drive Mastery" Come From?
Honestly, I have the heart of an artist and the eye of a designer. It causes a lot of artistic conflict. So for me, a lot of my inspiration comes purely from raw experimentation. This is true for 75% of my work. Drive Mastery was something different though. It came, like a few others, directly from the geometry of some of my own photography work. You'll see what I mean when you take a look at the following.

My Original Photo: dl.getdropbox.com/u/1140263/Qu…
Finished Drive Mastery: dl.getdropbox.com/u/1140263/Qu…

It's that kind of geometric endowment, the need for the extra movement outside of the lines inherent, and the challenge to re-communicate the original, digitally, that I found inspiring. So yeah, I'm looking everywhere for new ideas.


7. Do I ever use Anyone Else's Layer Styles?
Nope. No point. More fun to make my own---and often times in looking at other people's, I find that none of them are exactly what I want. I build them all from scratch, mostly relying on gradients, transparency, and the many ways to inner and outer shadow them to give any shape the desired effect. Lately I've even been leaving alone the "bevel and emboss" option, with the exception of needing it to have just a tad more extra light somewhere.

Looking at pre-made layer styles, though, is very good for a beginner. This is because they can open up the Blending Options and tinker around until they get a good feel of what's going on in there. That's how I learned them---even if I never use them in my work.

What's really important to know about Layer Styles though, is that you don't have to use just one on one object. You can use several! And I do. Typically I find that I'll use anywhere from two to four depending on the look I want. I do this by duplicating the first layer and taking out the "fill", and layering over the new Layer Style on top of the old. Once you get the hang of it, I think you'll be pretty amazed at how much further you can manipulate the look of an object... giving you ultimately more control, and a better end result.


8. My Beef with Minimalism
Oh, this. This thing called "Minimalism". This thing where you take out EVERYTHING and just leave what's "important". You know, I think this is great (when done right) for web pages and advertising design... but not for a fucking wallpaper. If someone wants a blank screen with just a color and a blur, they should put on their grandmother's glasses and set their screensaver to text-scroll.
I think to myself: I have a big blank canvas, I have these tools... lets use them!

I don't know about you, but when I walk into a room and it's been interior designed to look "modern", I think... wow. So cool! And then ten minutes later I want to scream because there's no... anything. Anywhere. It's boring and unattractive and ultimately I can never feel like I've finished anything in my art taking that route. It reeks of "I am plain", and I just cannot stand to let a person's desktop say that about them. I mean, this IS desktop art we're talking about here, right? and our desktops have to speak about things we like, because we're all individuals with something to say about ourselves.

If you want to be plain, go ahead. But don't come to me to help, because I haven't the "patience" to give you nothing. Some of you guys are really good at this kind of work, and I apologize to you if you're offended. But I might also remind you that you do cater to the very people I give the finger to, so I suppose in the end we have a fine working relationship, huh?


9. My Work is Rather Over-the-Top.
It is. I admit it. I do it intentionally. I'm a minimalist's nightmare.
My goal has aways been to use as much of my canvas as i can without it looking too cluttered, keeping your interest as a viewer, and embellishing it with as many little things to keep your eye interested as i can. I don't always do this successfully, and any of you out there trying it probably know how hard this actually is to attempt. Sometimes it's just a mess! But sometimes, too, I strike gold and it makes me think... it's a good thing I didn't take out EVERYTHING and just leave what's "important". Erhm.

Still, I think it's important to keep clear the notion that when I'm working in a 2560x1600 canvas, I need to be familiar with the space it contains. That includes every corner, and every negative space I create by filling an area with something. To be able to shape an area that large in a way that is continually filled with embellishments---you have to realize that you're simultaneously changing the constant of the negative space's weights, and well... this is kind of an interesting and fun way to deliberate on (and juggle!) the quadrants within the piece. That's something to keep in mind, you know. That there ARE places in the canvas of your work that you have to keep paying attention to. i think some people forget that once the main part is done.

Of course you're welcome to not bother with it, and just stick a center-piece in and call it done. Lots of people do very successfully. Even me. But you have to admit that after awhile your work starts to look patterned and your style starts to feel the same because of the pattern you've made. Ultimately though, you should realize that if you push yourself you could do more than just be lazy and throw something in the middle to keep our attentions. Variate, damnit, variate I say!

10. It All Looks The Same.
Yeah, I suppose in a way it always will now that I've groomed myself the way I have. This is the price you pay for having a style. Some won't like it, others will love it. Some will beg you to do something different for the sake of your talent, and others will chastise you for selling out. Some people will assume you're only capable of doing one thing well, and others will see the effort within and understand that you just like what you're doing and can do many other things.

But in the end, it's all the same. Why? I'll tell, but here comes your very important advice, too.

Because you'll never change who you are. You spirit is yours and yours alone and this makes you and your art partial to only you. Which leaves, inevitably, that simply your final work is here to be discerned in the same manner as your likability as a person.

Your best friend to counteract this is the diversity of ideas in which you are able to present to your peers. This means specifically: your ability to challenge yourself in order to give your diversity credence is inherent only to that which inspires you the most. Unless you're a lazy bastard. Sometimes I am.
:shrug:


Now I understand there weren't a lot of technical ends here... so just go ahead and hit me with some questions, if you want. I wanna talk Photohsop!!!   






That's that.

See You Soon!
-Jesse

AHiL


</blockquote>







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Jack: The Final Update

Journal Entry: Wed Aug 5, 2009, 7:50 AM






UPDATE: August | 05 | 2009

Jack had her final surgery as of Friday June 31st to remove the pin from her leg. All went without a hitch and we were able to pick her up that same day. There were no aftercare instructions whatsoever, and she was putting LOTS of weight on her leg. This was a very good thing because it meant no more being locked up in her home made Healing Cage! Ohhhhh we hated having her in there. Yuck.

So, after she got home and shook off the drowsy sleep of her anesthetic, she was in full form. No more discomfort! By the second day she was acting like a normal kitten... jumping, playing, running up and down steps, and racing around from room to room happy as can be.

I'm pleased to say that by today, almost a week later, there's virtually no sign of her limp!! Initially the Doc had said it was "possible" she could retain "something of a limp" for the rest of her life. Couldn't be happier that she won't.

Since she's improved (and because she's growing so quickly), we've had a good sampling of her personality. What an adorable little thing! Unlike most cats, she's not too much into the "climbing high" thing. Instead, she prefers to play laying down on her side. Not out of laziness---but because she's developed this really astonishing move where she propels her laying self across the floor with all of her legs/claws, while the front also steer her.

She's become quite the adept at this, able to crawl around the scratching post I made her in super quick circles. Pretty hilarious. She's also very fond of tissue paper. She has three colors, but she seems to prefer the pink! As well, I've been teaching her to fetch and she's marvelous at it. Smart little thing. Except, sometimes she'd rather see me get up and get her toy from the half-way point than have a treat, lol.

Now, if we could get her to stop attacking Rox's feet in the wee hours of the morning (that's how she tries to wake us up, next to rubbing her face in ours), life would be just about perfect! Well, that and she really loves me and wants to sit in my lap all day while I'm working... so I'm growing accustomed to my legs falling asleep, lol.

I'd have taken more pictures, but she hates the camera (puffs herself all up at the sight of it) and is VERY fast. I might have to wait until she's sleeping or catch her off guard. ;P

:heart:

Hope you guys are awesome, and talk to you all soon.
-Jesse

AHiL


UPDATE: July | 29 | 2009

Sorry for the long wait on an update, but we've been a lot busy.

Jack's been doing fine. We did have another incident with her leg---but it's nothing at all serious. She's just too rambunctious to sit still with a pin in her leg. I think the top of the pin (which is poking out the top of her leg under the skin) is just irritating her as she lays and plays. Since it's definitely causing her some pain, we've been keeping her confined as of this last week.

Thankfully her appointment to have the pin surgically removed is tomorrow (Thursday)!!

This means that all donations for Jack are officially closed.

Thank you SO much to all of you who donated not just cash, but your good will and love. All of it has been an unexpected delight, a source of great support, and for Jack: you've helped to ensure the last (and most important) step of her veterinary care. In the next couple weeks after her surgery she should be able to be the bright and excited little kitten she wants to be.

...YOU made that happen.

The people in this community are made of gold and sunlight. Yes, even you darker souls out there. Rox, Jack, and I are retarded-grateful to all of you, and we love you lots.









</blockquote>







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Touching on Art Theft and Misuse

Journal Entry: Fri Jun 26, 2009, 7:57 AM






Death Can Shiny 1UP by ItchyBarracuda ‹‹ Thoughts on Art Theft ››

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Being popular is not entirely a gift, standing out is not always filled with exalted joy, and being a talented artist can at times be taxing. All of this last statement becomes especially agreeable when it comes down to your very elaborate creations being stolen and/or misused.

Today is another of those days for me where I've come to find a combination of those very two things. However illegal, immoral, inexcusable, and vexing it is, I rarely find myself irate about it. I'd be lying if I said that in some ways I wasn't grateful that my work has enough presence and admiration to be stolen... but I think moreover it is much more to do with that fact that I expect it to happen. I anticipate it all the time. And so should you!

When you come up with a really intricate new wall, and you're looking it over, enjoying the self-satisfaction of delivering creation from your spirit to the world, your very first thought should be "I wonder where this will end up?"---and this question should persist even more evidently the instant you finish the upload, form, and go to click the Submit button.

This is entirely true for me.

It is more evident at that precise moment because I understand very intimately that in this split-second I have made a choice. I have decided to do the opposite---yes, the complete antithesis of what is the safest for my work. I am increasing the risk of these dangers from 0 to 100%, and delivering it up to the apathetic laws of probability, the cunning of human greed, and the unlimited space of the Internet.

Am I saying that by default you and I have a responsible part in the blame of our own art being stolen? I give you a resounding YES. Yes it IS in part your fault, and you should accept that instantly. Is it of moral injustice? Unethical? Or simply Wrong? Definitely, and you can put as much indignation into that as you like, but that doesn't change the fact that your art was stolen because you left it there for the stealing.

Does that amend your rights as an artist? No, of course not. You lose no rights as an artist and instantly you should be taking action to protect not only your work but said rights. Though doing it with an immense anger only really solves the question of how you feel in that instant, and offers you no other help. At least, I know I care not to hear it. I'm not in denial, I just think there's better ways to spend the time.

I was very unsympathetic when I was Moderating for wallpapers and would get a note about how someone's art was stolen. VERY unsympathetic. Why? Because I expected it to happen to you guys as much as I did myself. That expectation fulfilled, I most certainly offered every bit of advice, kindness, and help I could---but at the same time, there was just no way to sympathize with the angered deviant who would write... because the situation was the result of their decision making. And they would rant on, and yell in capitals, and talk about all these things from their very wounded pride atop their very righteous moral horse...

...and never once did I hear any of them say: "This fucking sucks and I'm going to murder myself for letting my own art into the wild to be trapped by art poachers, credit-takers, and the rare pyschotic". I think if I had, I could actually sympathize with that. That is a sensible reason to be irate.

My art has been all over the Internet in various forms: chopped, hacked, altered, credited wrongly, uncredited entirely, solicited... even I've seen a couple people who just try to recreate my ideas on their own. I have read my rights more times, filled out more DMCA forms, pushed more Abuse, Contact Us, and Report buttons, than I care to admit in the last few years of my art. And I don't think one time---even when it happened here---did I put out public rant, decrial, or put on my cape and cowl to tirade over the site in order to appease the anger of my 'vigilant' quest.

I just took care of it. So simple!
I just took care of it today. So simple!
It means I have to wait. It means I have to monitor. It means I have to be patient.
I will. It sucks, but I will.
I cannot police the Internet. Hell, I can't police even an tenth of dA. Why bother to try?
No, truly if I felt that intensely about it I'd have stopped in that instant of reckoning. Yes, I'd have stopped myself right there when clarity was all around me, and that threat of future consequence loomed the most specific over my head, and made the decision NOT to press the Submit button.

...because the safest place for my art is to never let it leave my computer. I know many of you find the paradox here, but this is truth and thr truth cannot be refuted, no matter how many biscuits one can stuff in their ear.

Keep this in mind, my friends, when your work is stolen. It will help you be more efficient in handling it.

For fun and safety in knowledge, here's some stuff you might like to see on this topic in general:







That's that.

See You Soon!
-Jesse

AHiL










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Currently... + D.E.S.

Journal Entry: Thu May 28, 2009, 11:31 AM






Death Can Shiny 1UP by ItchyBarracuda ‹‹Recent News››

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When my passions roared for the last few years here, "Seldom" was a word I didn't expect to apply to certain things at deviatART. Journals would have fit the word for me, perhaps. We all know I suck at keeping them up-to-date. News Articles probably would fit the shoe once upon a time, too. I didn't have a lot of time between the art and Moderating. Coming to the point, "Seldom" seems to relate to me and the deviantART experience as a whole now.

I am seldom here, seldom submitting, and seldom interacting.

I am, however, still here. It's infrequent, I know. But I would like to maintain to you that I am not leaving dA permanently, nor am I reducing my activities here out of spite. Contrariwise, I'm simply expanding my Internet horizons at every corner which draws thin my time everywhere.

My plan is to continue to release great wallpapers, but in a more site-specific way. I'm currently uploading some of my older walls (found here) at several sites to create a foundation for people who may not have seen my stuff here. Once I've a certain grounding with that, I shall begin to release new walls in various places, and only at those sites.

I think equal time to a variety of places will increase my exposure and (fingers crossed) bring better opportunities.

For someone with no formal art/design schooling, I've begun to think that perhaps I can make-up for that blank credential slot by offering a show of diligence. Consider how many other sites might feature your work if it was there? And consider, too, how these myriad potential awards will look to your future clients?

Sure, I can list my small handful of Daily Deviation awards from here. But better, having expanded the deviantART territory, I can list those as well as myriad other site features and awards. Scoutings at artician, for example. Features at JackRebel.com, GUIPulp, etc.

I've never limited myself in my creations, so why should I with the places that I offer them?

So there you have it. I'm here, checking in every so often (and still faving, I might add)... but that's about it. Expect to see fewer walls from me here... but feel assured they will come. I'm also implementing a sort of "home base" where I can announce which new walls are released where---I just don't have it entirely sorted out yet.

I'm pretty happy about this decision. Just from thinking further than what's in front of me, I've already made several new artistic achievements, including completion of some of my very first sets of client commissions. Very encouraging, I think.

Now, let's talk about some old news that's been on the back-burner for awhile.

Death Can Shiny 1UP by ItchyBarracuda ‹‹Want to take over the Devious Exposure Squad?››

>>>>~--~-- | † | --~--~<<<<


It was a great idea. It was a wonderful approach to new artists. it was fun, it was exciting, it was philanthropic... and now it's very much defunct. Mostly because about nine million things happened right at the first issue, which stalled us, and then my time ran short which definitely killed it. I've felt very guilty about that, simply on community principal.

I admit I still don't have the time for it, nor would I feel willing to make the time for it. But... maybe YOU can?

Explain to me how you think you might be qualified to take over the DES and get it back to helping artists on dA and I'll turn over the keys to the Headquarters to you. This could, quite frankly, be a lot of work. I have no idea how many people on the old team are still interested---but one could always start anew, couldn't they?

I will of course gladly help you get comfortable with the technical ends, offer any extra graphics and original PSDs I can until a new source can be found, and assist in the fine tuning the structure of the Squad should you need it.

Understand that when groups launches site-wide, the DES could really be a powerful tool to help expose and shape upcoming artists, as well as to nurture and groom those with the potential to do more. It can, because Groups claim to offer a kind of community interaction that is thusfar not available... and if it ends up to be true... well, just imagine how many people YOU could be helping!

Note me here regarding this if you're serious about taking it up. If you've doubts, or have questions... note me still and we'll talk them out. Yes?

That's that.

See You Soon!
-Jesse

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Recycled and Redone, New CSS

Journal Entry: Mon Apr 6, 2009, 2:43 PM




‹‹Bullets 4 Quickness››

>>>>~--~-- | † | --~--~<<<<


:bulletred: I do too many things. Lately, dA just hasn't been on the list of requirements for the creative juices I'm oozing. Sorry about that!!

:bulletblack: I'm slowing migrating some work to WinCustomize.com... at some point, you'll see a few WinCustomize-only walls there. :w00t:

:bulletblack: Did you know splintered13 has taken up my old shoes as Wallpaper GM??? There's no one better for the job. Go give him your DD suggestions for your favorite desktop art!!

:bulletblack: Another thank you for the watches and favorites, you guys are outstanding and hopefully I can maintain these accounts in a... erhm... timely way.

:bulletwhite: Two new sites added to my recommended stuff at AHiLdesigns. Check them out: Enter the Splinter & iBlackmilk|Blog. That's good stuff!!

:bulletblack: More design stuff coming... and yes, there's more Layer Styles and other resources on the way. Stay tuned.

:bulletred: I have coffee, thank goodness.

:bulletred: Rox and I are doing great. Spending lots of time together and happy as can be.

:bulletblack: Book, book, book. I've been editing the manuscript like mad. Working on getting published. Rox is a huge help... she's SO made of win.

:bulletblack: For those of you who don't already know, you can find all of my Design Art (and my old avatar! lol) at AHiLdesigns.

:bulletwhite: Your mom!!!

:bulletred: Fuck, I'm tired.

:bulletred: Been playing Left 4 Dead, Resident Evil 5, and Soul Calibur IV so much my eyes are buggy and all I can think to do in real life is either shoot people who look like zombies or bash things as though I'm holding a sword. Yikes!

:bulletblack: Tell me what you're doing to house your portfolios. I'd like to make one, haven't the foggiest how.

:bulletred: I'm wearing a pair of Red pajama-bottoms that are covered in black skulls. Hawt, huh?

-Jesse

PS
This information has been recycled from AHiLdesigns in order to fill in those who aren't watching me there!


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Recycled AHiL News

Journal Entry: Mon Apr 6, 2009, 12:09 PM






Death Can Shiny 1UP by ItchyBarracuda ‹‹Bullets 4 Quickness››

>>>>~--~-- | † | --~--~<<<<


:bulletred: I do too many things. Lately, dA just hasn't been on the list of requirements for the creative juices I'm oozing. Sorry about that!!

:bulletblack: I'm slowing migrating some work to WinCustomize.com... at some point, you'll see a few WinCustomize-only walls there. :w00t:

:bulletblack: Did you know splintered13 has taken up my old shoes as Wallpaper GM??? There's no one better for the job. Go give him your DD suggestions for your favorite desktop art!!

:bulletblack: Another thank you for the watches and favorites, you guys are outstanding and hopefully I can maintain these accounts in a... erhm... timely way.

:bulletwhite: Two new sites added to my recommended stuff at AHiLdesigns. Check them out: Enter the Splinter & iBlackmilk|Blog. That's good stuff!!

:bulletblack: More design stuff coming... and yes, there's more Layer Styles and other resources on the way. Stay tuned.

:bulletred: I have coffee, thank goodness.

:bulletred: Rox and I are doing great. Spending lots of time together and happy as can be.

:bulletblack: Book, book, book. I've been editing the manuscript like mad. Working on getting published. Rox is a huge help... she's SO made of win.

:bulletblack: For those of you who don't already know, you can find all of my Design Art (and my old avatar! lol) at AHiLdesigns.

:bulletwhite: Your mom!!!

:bulletred: Fuck, I'm tired.

:bulletred: Been playing Left 4 Dead, Resident Evil 5, and Soul Calibur IV so much my eyes are buggy and all I can think to do in real life is either shoot people who look like zombies or bash things as though I'm holding a sword. Yikes!

:bulletblack: Tell me what you're doing to house your portfolios. I'd like to make one, haven't the foggiest how.

:bulletred: I'm wearing a pair of Red pajama-bottoms that are covered in black skulls. Hawt, huh?

-Jesse

PS
This information has been recycled from AHiLdesigns in order to fill in those who aren't watching me there!


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Black-Kat Test

Journal Entry: Mon Feb 9, 2009, 10:37 AM






Death Can Shiny 1UP by ItchyBarracuda ‹‹Lorem Ipsum››

>>>>~--~-- | † | --~--~<<<<


"Lorem ipsum dolor sit amet, consectetur adipisicing elit, sed do eiusmod tempor incididunt ut labore et dolore magna aliqua. Ut enim ad minim veniam, quis nostrud exercitation ullamco laboris nisi ut aliquip ex ea commodo consequat. Duis aute irure dolor in reprehenderit in voluptate velit esse cillum dolore eu fugiat nulla pariatur. Excepteur sint occaecat cupidatat non proident, sunt in culpa qui officia deserunt mollit anim id est laborum."























Death Can Shiny 1UP by ItchyBarracuda ‹‹Decisions²››

>>>>~--~-- | † | --~--~<<<<


"Sed ut perspiciatis unde omnis iste natus error sit voluptatem accusantium doloremque laudantium, totam rem aperiam, eaque ipsa quae ab illo inventore veritatis et quasi architecto beatae vitae dicta sunt explicabo. Nemo enim ipsam voluptatem quia voluptas sit aspernatur aut odit aut fugit, sed quia consequuntur magni dolores eos qui ratione voluptatem sequi nesciunt. Neque porro quisquam est, qui dolorem ipsum quia dolor sit amet, consectetur, adipisci velit, sed quia non numquam eius modi tempora incidunt ut labore et dolore magnam aliquam quaerat voluptatem. Ut enim ad minima veniam, quis nostrum exercitationem ullam corporis suscipit laboriosam, nisi ut aliquid ex ea commodi consequatur? Quis autem vel eum iure reprehenderit qui in ea voluptate velit esse quam nihil molestiae consequatur, vel illum qui dolorem eum fugiat quo voluptas nulla pariatur?"

Amen.

AHiL











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  • Listening to: Eric Clapton
  • Reading: Gmail, baby.
  • Watching: Heroes!
  • Playing: I don't have time for games.
  • Eating: Pizza!
  • Drinking: Your Every Word.

New Stuff

Journal Entry: Sun Feb 8, 2009, 11:19 AM






Death Can Shiny 1UP by ItchyBarracuda ‹‹Super Major Thanks!››

>>>>~--~-- | † | --~--~<<<<


After my last journal, the amount of support that all of you offered to not only Rox, but myself, was unparalleled. I want to thank each and every one of you for each word offered, whether they were words of hope or feelings of empathy. I wish that the situation hadn't been so difficult to process as it would have made commenting back in depth a little easier. As it was, it was, I was too moved by most of your words to give an appropriate response.

I'm supremely honored by the care and kindness put forth by the community to both of us, and wanted to make sure I let you all know that right off.

To  get you caught up: things are moving along. They're not perfect and nothing is like it was---but alas no one can stop time from edging forward. Clearly (by Rox's last journal) some new things have reared their heads and a little more clarity has come. Ultimately this means we'll be making some very big decisions... but this is the nature of life, and I'm certain no matter which path we choose we shall persevere.
There were people in this situation who have clearly wronged us. They know it, and we know it. Now it's just a matter of waiting for the truth to whittle it's way back into the eyes of those important so that the natural course of what is just can mend the places that have been misaligned.
I do believe wholeheartedly that accountability will be had, whether anyone knows it publicly or not. Right is Right and Wrong is Wrong... there's no escaping it with something of this magnitude. That's a good feeling. Couple that notion with all of your huge dA-love, support and friendship, and the days definitely are getting brighter.

:heart:

Let's get on to some art stuff now, shall we?



Death Can Shiny 1UP by ItchyBarracuda ‹‹Designer's Delight²››

>>>>~--~-- | † | --~--~<<<<


I love wallpapers. I started here on JesseLax as a wallpaper machine, and I'd like to continue that tradition as diligently as I can. Over time though, I started to place other things here that didn't have much to do with walls; things that were meant to help widen the abilities of the community. I've decided since then that I'd like to continue both of those traditions... but I want to maintain highlighting my passion for wallpapers by keeping this account to just that. Wallpapers and nothing else.

So, not long ago I opened AHiLdesigns to house design-specific work, and hopefully start getting some Graphic Design commissions.

What does this mean?

It means that I will no longer be uploading Resources, Tutorials, or regular Graphic Designs at this account. They will all be redirected to AHiLdesigns, so that I can keep this account to just walls and walls only. So I suggest you go give AHiLdesigns a watch if you're interested in that stuff. Of course I'll leave the few things I've done at this account here. I'd hate to delete your faves and comments!

As it is I've already uploaded two PSD resources there over the last week. I hope you'll dig them:

The first is another Layer Style PSD to follow up my last Designer's kit. For those of you who admired my last CSS, you'll want this download!


And the next is for those of you who are looking for a quick way to mock-up your deviantART visual ideas:
:thumb112149839:

I'll be swapping out my avatar here for something else (yes, probably a skull, lol), and donating this one to the new account. I hope it won't be too confusing... but that seems prudent. If you guys have any ideas for the new avatar here, or feel like making one you think I'll like---let me know here!

Anyhoo, more to come soon!
-Jesse

PS

( I know... no pretty CSS over there. I still need to get the thing subbed if I ever have money again. :faint: )

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Doing What's Right

Journal Entry: Thu Jan 29, 2009, 6:15 PM






Death Can Shiny 1UP by ItchyBarracuda ‹‹A Long Hello››

>>>>~--~-- | † | --~--~<<<<


I've got a lot to say right now, so please, if you're interested... go get yourself a drink and squiggle in all comfy in your chair. It's going to be a minute.

If you're just here for the important facts, skip to the next module.

I'm going to address some of the things you've all been hearing lately about my fiancé, KariAnnLax, but only as it pertains to me, our relationship, and my personal opinions on it.
I shall not in any way divulge private information specifically or otherwise, nor will I be begging, urging, or in any way insinuating to you to start a cause-driven lobby against the governing $taff body of deviantART. Conspiracy theorists may leave now, as may flamers and all the other ignorant fucks who are looking to gain account / comment / pageview alacrity by borrowing attention from a serious and meaningful situation.

Also, this isn't written to add to "dArama". This is real life, folks. Living tangible and large outside of the internet. And while it is "just" the internet, in the case of us, the internet has an affect that spreads through our corporeal life. This means there are actual emotions and significant sets of people relative to us whose lives are changed by this in many ways. It's not funny, it isn't a joke, and it isn't offered here for your dispute. This is my life, these are my thoughts and emotions, and I'm putting them here for those people out there that care about that fact, and thereby me.

If you're ready, let's get to it.

Based on all that has been going on as of late, perhaps it's true that some of you might have suspected I would probably discontinue volunteering my time to deviantART. Genuinely, when KariAnnLax was dismissed from her employment with the company, I think it's safe to say I had a lot running through my mind. I wasn't quite sure what to do. An important part of our life is/was deviantART and its inherent community... right from the very the beginning for both of us. Quite literally this is true, being that we met right here on the site and have since both been very visible deviants.

So it came as quite a blow to she and I personally, and that same blow inevitably trickled it's way down to our family. In part because employment effects anyone who intimately surrounds the person employed, and in part because Rox and I are both very zealous and passionate supporters of dA. You just can't have a conversation with either one of us (together or alone) without hearing us talk about this community and how awesome it is. So it is now that our belief systems have been maimed by the very thing that we each cherished so deeply. And excuse me if I take a bitter moment to say: a maimed belief system is a little more than just feelings being hurt.

Anyway, It's left me to have to deeply think, re-evaluate, process, and finally decide.



Death Can Shiny 1UP by ItchyBarracuda ‹‹Decisions²››

>>>>~--~-- | † | --~--~<<<<


I very much enjoy my time here and love having the opportunity to do the few things I've done for the benefit of all of us. It's a rich and entertaining experience that I feel very blessed to be able to partake in. Even so, the way things are now I can no longer find myself looking zealously at deviantART. It's not the fault of any of you, nor the many moments I've had to connect with this site and the galleries within it. Neither is it because of any loss of passion for the genre that I love so much. No my friends, wallpapers for me will always be an epic portion of my drive as a Design Artist and person.

While at this precise moment I feel uncomfortable expressing what exact minutia has changed in my view of deviantART with verbal exactness, I am inclined to say that it has (in general) everything to do with feeling completely let-down by the bright "ideal" I once had of deviantART... which successively has everything to do with KariAnnLax's current situation. My spirits are truly dampened, my trust in the important people I've met is skewed in a way far removed from where it was only days ago. Ultimately it's up to me to weigh these feelings and thoughts against my support of all of you, my support of this site, and my support of my family.

What's logical is that I keep my status as a GM and remain your emissary to the Administration to help keep us all tied together.
What's right, true, and just, is that I stand at my fiancé's side and show my support in every way possible.

After some time tossing those two things around, it finally occurred to me very plainly that by supporting KariAnnLax, I am</u> supporting you. This is true because she was an outstanding deviant before she wore the very same hat I'm wearing as a volunteer. It was her excellence there as not only a GM, but as person, which led her to being offered a position as Assistant Director of Community Relations—and it was that commendable work that brought her to where her deepest passion truly rested: Manager of Film Development... even for as short the allowed stay was.
Now, you guys out there, you're all awesome in your own right. Each one of you... but when one of us deviants can stand up amongst the rest and not only crescendo, but touch the highest peaks—isn't it that very deviant who we all have helped to get there, simply by existing around them?
Yes, that was rhetorical. Of course it is. We couldn't have deviants who excel so precisely without all of us being here together in our immense diversity. We all are active at different levels and it's this very fundamental system that lets people just like KariAnnLax ascend to places we know they belong.   

So I choose to support her. And I'm showing it by hanging up my hat, politely declining my time, and letting someone else take over helping archanN in the amazing role of your Wallpaper Gallery Moderator.

Do I still believe in the community? I give a resounding Yes.

However, using the word "community" I mean specifically all of you fucking brilliantly talented people out there with whom I've shared so many conversations, thoughts, ideas, laughter, and lives. So deeply am I tied to you now that I intend for you to see even more of me than you ever have. So stay tuned. I may be offering up my hat to be half-broken into a tick, but I'm not going anywhere.
Of course all of you are more than welcome to still note me with general art/wallpaper questions, but anything that's deviantART specific, bug-related, or Community Relations related will all have to go to archanN or Moonbeam13

In closing, a very good friend of mine who has also recently relinquished their position as a GM offered me some very wise words. The statement relates not just to me, Rox, and this whole situation, but also to all of you out there who are looking to make deviantART a better place.

I'd like to end this journal with those words, in th hopes of keeping your spirits high, and to let you into my current mind-frame:


"...there's nothing we do in C.R. we cant do without the ^ except post DD's and move the miscats. But as far as community interaction, we don't need those."

Amen.

AHiL











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Want to do Design Work for the CIA?

Journal Entry: Tue Jan 27, 2009, 3:19 PM
:iconkariannlax:
.DEVIOUS.
spotlight







:hypermind: ‹‹CIA Graphic Designers Needed››
>>>>~--~-- | | --~--~<<<<

You read that correctly. The American Central Intelligence Agency is looking for graphic designers! They're only asking for the kind of experience most high-end employers would... erhm... with the exception of the medical, polygraph, and psychological exam you have to pass.

...and the risk of being executed on site by a black-ops spy from (insert name of country here).

Honestly though, for any of you here in the U.S. who have the qualifications, I'd jump at this one. It's a giant salary and excellent benefits.

For those of you like me who have absolutely NO chance whatsoever to land a gig like that... you should at least go check out the page and get a giggle. ;P

Find it here: www.cia.gov/careers/jobs/view-…



...and yeah, there's lots still going on in the KariAnnLax department, but I'm still trying to sort out my feelings, get a grip on what we should do next in our personal lives, and give my all in trying to support our family here at home who are going through even more hardships than what's just happened with Rox. It's just bad timing all the way around.... for seemingly everything.

Please be patient with me if I'm not around much for the next few days or so.
...I :heart: you guys...

================================================
On My Rox:

I appreciate the incoming notes and questions regarding the latest dArama surrounding my beloved. As it is, I find myself at a devastating loss for words.

Please go give your love, respect, and support to KariAnnLax during this very difficult time. It is truly moments like these where we as a community should pull together to offer a shoulder and lend our strength.

:thumb97886511:



-AHiL
:skullbones::heart::skullbones:








  • Watching: Unkown Artists

`FallenRox

Journal Entry: Fri Jan 23, 2009, 12:41 PM
:iconkariannlax:
.DEVIOUS.
spotlight







:hypermind: ‹‹My Rox Rocks››
>>>>~--~-- | :fallenrox: by UnicornReality | --~--~<<<<

I appreciate the incoming notes and questions regarding the latest dArama surrounding my beloved. As it is, I find myself at a devastating loss for words.

Please go give your love, respect, and support to KariAnnLax during this very difficult time. It is truly moments like these where we as a community should pull together to offer a shoulder and lend our strength.

:thumb97886511:



-AHiL
:skullbones::heart::skullbones:








  • Watching: Unkown Artists

The Journal That Should Have been Here yesterday

Journal Entry: Sat Jan 17, 2009, 1:24 AM
:iconsplintered13:
.DEVIOUS.
spotlight







:hypermind: ‹‹New Things››
>>>>~--~-- |~| --~--~<<<<

Lots of new things, both in deviantART, and personally. I'll hit the personal in Red bullets and the dA stuff in Black.

:bulletred: First, I'd like to announce that KariAnnLax is not pregnant with anything but her own LOVE FOR SLAPPING ME and an incredible amount of inspiration. To my dismay, all rumors of her bearing the Spawn of Satan have been a hoax, and are hereby abolished. This is not to say, of course, that I am not the devil. I could be. You've been warned.

:bulletred: Second... did you see this new shit on my page?!?! OMG!!! I'm loving being able to pimp you guys in the Wallpaper Gallery. look!! look!!! :faint: Sorry, I know I said "black" for dA stuff, but I'm PERSONALLY so excited that I can't help myself!!!

:bulletred: Next is... we're still remodeling. This is mostly why I haven't been journaling lately. However, I'm pleased to say that BabyRoxx is superbly happy with her newly constructed room! As well, the middle-floor bathroom is 99% complete---with the hardest and most exciting, the tile work, all gleaming and beautiful. Pictures to come soon.

:bulletred: I'm currently [in the midst of all this other stuff -ed.] also developing a game on Facebook, using the "SG Studio" application. The editing-application itself is very basic (still being in beta), as is the graphical structure of the game---but luckily I've been spending every spare second learning to skin web-pages in Stylish, and have created an awesome look for it. I'm keeping it all very hush-hush for now, but it's going to rock! More on this later.

:bulletred: KariAnnLax is my light in the dark, puts a smile on my face every day, and has been keeping me sane through some of the harder parts of these last few weeks. There's actually been quite a few rough patches, but I'm not the type to tout my hardships, nor offer specifics. Suffice it to say that things are looking a little more up, and that's awesome!

:bulletred: I've several things in the works in terms of art. Still working on an upgrade to the "Anti-Theft" card, which is going to be a fun resource for you guys. As well, a couple more wallpapers are almost done---and one very special, single-resolution, widescreen wall will be coming to you very shortly. It's creation was experimental, and I stupidly did it in a way where it's now UN-resizable without remarkable distortion to the piece. but it still rocks... and if you guys like it enough perhaps I can do some kind of half-assed cropping job on it? We'll see what you think when it's here.

:bulletblack: I've been told that our Gallery Streamlining for wallpapers is still in the works. There were some technical errors that were difficult for deviantART's team of Tech geniuses to overcome, but they are doing so little by little... and, fingers crossed, perhaps this means that we'll have it done sometime in the near future. As well, our FAQs have been redone---BUT BEFORE YOU GO RACING TO SEE THEM---please note that some errors have happened through the passing of information, so I'll be going through this week and correcting them and sending them to the appropriate party to make sure it's formatted all nice and pretty.

:bulletblack: DES? WTF, where IS IT?? Currently am still trying to get the Squad that was once the DES back on track. I'm doing well with it, we officially have a new headquarters ( DeviousExposureSquad, currently under construction) have a lot of new ideas and things for you guys to play with while we search out n00bz! However, I'm waiting for the launch of Groups before I say any official "We're Ready". Sound cool with you?

:bulletblack: omg. DID YOU SEE MY PAGE??!?! I LOVE IT!!! Sorry. I had to again. At least it's in the right place this time. ;)

:bulletblack: I've got a feature coming soon. Featuring... YOU! If you show up in my inbox, anyway. As I write my Internet is currently being a fuck-face and not working (hence this journal should have come out sooner *kills the road runner*). But I've every intention of getting you guys some community face-time in SUPER HUGE wallpaper feature. Stay tuned.

:bulletblack: Disappointing results for the Epic Logo Challenge, but at last we do have answers. Go read about it here: news.deviantart.com/article/67…

:bulletblack: Go give archanN some love!

:bulletblack: You guys have been sending me some awesome DD's to put up. Thank you so much!! Please remember that if you get no response, it's not because I don't like you, it's because I (for whatever reason) didn't think the community would care for the DD---or I'm saving it for a certain time (at which point you'll get a response to let you know when it's bing showcased).

:bulletwhite: Er... and now I'm out of stuff. Ask me some questions or something. I feel kinda gabby. ooh! And poll suggestions would be cool. You guys have any burning questions about the WP gallery you'd like to see the feedback on?

That's that. See you in the comments (and up there on my front page OMG!!!)
-AHiL
:skullbones::heart::skullbones:









- I SUPPORT -

FallenRox stamp by KariAnnLax
:thumb68486910:
:thumb51370305:




:skullbones::skullbones::skullbones::skullbones::skullbones::skullbones::skullbones:

- ABOUT ME -

allhopeislost stamp by Thiefoworld
AHiL stamp by Roxcessories
I Use AHiL Wallpapers by splintered13


:flame:AHiL Supporters
- KariAnnLax
- splintered13
- mrrste
- HuGo07
- OtisBee
- LawrenceDeDark
- Crazyflashanimator
- CapMoreno
- rebstile
- Marker-Guru


:+favlove:Clubs
- VampyreArmy
- DeskModders


:ufo:My Top Deviations
- Anti-Theft Card PSD
- Retro Xplod, 1920 Preview
- AHiL - Varied Glass

:+fav:Collaborative Works
The following packs are joint efforts made by me for GUI Kits created by other artists here at dA. I'd like to note, that both GUI Themes were awarded DD's, as was the Revlover WP pack on it's own.


Made for Revolver by smoovie

Made for Ag SiO GUI-kit by DeskModders


Other deviantART Accounts

:iconthe-ahil-paradox:
The-AHiL-Paradox

:icondarkitexture:
darkiTexture

  • Watching: Unkown Artists

Avatar: Santa Skull by FantasyStockAvatars And a Macabre Christmas to One, and All!! Avatar: Santa Skull by FantasyStockAvatars



Some people love it, some people hate it. And Me? I don't mind Christmas, really. I like the energy people have for it, and I'm definitely a fan of the color Red. Still, it's a lot too perky for me, with all of this Happy Santa and Reindeer and Snowflakes and Perky little kids with their colorful stockings...

...it gets to you!! So in an effort to encourage Christmas spirit without the perkiness, I've searched out some Weirdly Macabre Holiday/Christmas Art from multiple genres for your viewing pleasure (or displeasure, as it may well be).

Enjoy!



:thumb71210570:  
:thumb72264927:  
the christmas skull by Monochrome-Clown   Yuletide turned by day-seriani
   Burtonesque Xmas by MADmoiselleMeli
christmas skull by jego0320   Santa Skull by yummytacoburp69
Christmas Jack by charkole   Ghosts of Christmas by CookiemagiK
Have an Evil Chao Christmas by Swirlything   Merry Christmas by SandraKristin
Christmas Skull Ring by Sompy-Stuff   Christmas Skull by AlexSatriani
Christmas Spirit rockin' by palmations   Santa skull by mikemaster
Glowing Skull with Santa's Cap by aceIII   Xmas ID by RS-foto
A Dark Christmas by cryptic-sacrifice   Evil Frosty by MonsterInk
:thumb105525379:  

Mature Content

Last Christmas by thatcraftychick

Skull Cane by cmastea5   Christmas is dead. Finally. by Minigeg
Santa Skullaus by NickMockoviak  :thumb25884327:

Mature Content

The Red Nose Slain-Deer by DickStarr
   Jolly Ol Saint Roger by Go-Baby-Go
Oh no... SANTA NOOO by AlMaNeGrA   merry Xmas from D by Dokuro
Scary Christmas Tree by justinaerni  :thumb71868173:
:thumb106480364:   Haw haw haw by sobreiro

Mature Content

A Cozy Fire by Treason1
   Jack 2 by Emotikill
:thumb4348998:   CS: EvilSnowman's Strikes by UnknownSoulCollector
:thumb13411518:   AVATAR: Spooky Skull Snowglobe by FantasyStockAvatars
Little Match Girl by Aklna  :thumb106793892:
merry christmas by OscarCelestini  :thumb45219889:
Pirate Santa Claus by orderofstandrew





Much love, and Have a very scary Christmas!!
-AHiL

:skullbones::heart::skullbones:

Los Angeles, CA

Journal Entry: Thu Dec 11, 2008, 12:54 PM
:iconthe-ahil-paradox:







:hypermind: Welcome to Hollywood
:bulletred:>>>>Adventures From LA<<<<:bulletred:

I've been to Los Angeles before.
A little over a decade ago myself and two very close friends emptied our bank accounts, bought supplies, packed our Alice Packs in the trunk of a Dodge Ares, and left Minnesota for the love of travel.

The idea was a romantic one: to search out adventure and see exactly where life would put us. As it was, a week of sleeping in the car, knowing no one in the area, and scrounging for work ended up to be too much for the friend who happened to own the car. Timid guy, even if a good friend. Still, my other friend and I---for as much as we craved adventure---tried to be accommodating.

The day we left LA, we were at a McDonalds, just across from The Whiskey. I remember distinctly that Melissa Ethridge was headlining The Whiskey that night. The air was perfect, warm and whistling through the palm trees. I could feel a very electric vibe in the air while the streets and sidewalks were bustling... and I knew I didn't want to leave.

In speaking of our being "accommodating", I mean to say that we relented to leave with him even for as disappointed as we were. This didn't last long. On the ride home he got us lost three times, we blew out two tires... and the tension between he and us was building. Eventually (and certainly not kindly), the adventurous friend and I gave in to our cravings, grabbed our packs and hitchhiked the rest of the way home.
The rest of the tale does go on in a whole different adventure, but penultimately, this was my first experience with LA.

Now, I'm here again---even if for a wholly other (and perhaps more exciting than I would have found in my youth) reason. I'm very pleased to say it feels the same, right down to the smells and feeling in the air. The really exciting part, however, being here at deviantART HQ... that story is coming soon. I can tell you as of now every part has been awesome, and I've been very honored to meet all of the people who make the community we love so much happen. Everyone has been very kind, extremely accommodating (and not in the way that I was to my friend so long ago---but in the actual way), and overall filled with a wonderful energy.

Stay tuned for the full story in the near future. In the meantime, for those of you addicted to hearing about our beloved HQ, see wynnesome's journal, Here.


And of course: go fave some features!

Be Seeing You,
-Jesse (AHiL)
:skullbones::heart::skullbones:



</blockquote>








Christmas Aurora Wallpaper Package by ZeroniX-Designs Excidium by TobiasRoetsch
CCCP by struka Bubbles play by pincel3d
Target Practice WS by Casperium :thumb105855065:
I heart to heart by Kjherstin :thumb105940111:
Tuscany Chateau by AndreaAndrade Devilish - Wallpaper Pack by MelissaFindley
Devil by nicobou Charming Prince by nicobou
Where Snowflakes Are Born by vladstudio Christmas Joy Widescreen by DigitalPhenom












- I SUPPORT -

FallenRox stamp by KariAnnLax
:thumb68486910:
:thumb51370305:



fav-ninja by CookiemagiK


:skullbones::skullbones::skullbones::skullbones::skullbones::skullbones::skullbones:

- ABOUT ME -

allhopeislost stamp by Thiefoworld
AHiL stamp by Roxcessories
I Use AHiL Wallpapers by splintered13


:flame:AHiL Supporters
- KariAnnLax
- splintered13
- mrrste
- HuGo07
- OtisBee
- damien-c
- l8
- LawrenceDeDark
- Crazyflashanimator
- CapMoreno
- MysticGenius
- rebstile
- Marker-Guru


:+favlove:Clubs
- VampyreArmy
- DeskModders


:ufo:My Top Deviations
- Anti-Theft Card PSD
- Retro Xplod, 1920 Preview
- AHiL - Varied Glass

:+fav:Collaborative Works
The following packs are joint efforts made by me for GUI Kits created by other artists here at dA. I'd like to note, that both GUI Themes were awarded DD's, as was the Revlover WP pack on it's own.


Made for Revolver by smoovie

Made for Ag SiO GUI-kit by DeskModders


Other deviantART Accounts

:iconthe-ahil-paradox:
The-AHiL-Paradox

:icondarkitexture:
darkiTexture

  • Watching: Unkown Artists

3 out of 4 Doctors Think Mindloss is Right 4 You

Journal Entry: Mon Dec 8, 2008, 8:39 AM
:iconthe-ahil-paradox:







:hypermind: That Thing in My Head
:bulletred:>>>>Has Come and Gone<<<<:bulletred:

Somewhere, somehow, the lines have all been crossed... and out fell my mind. Remodeling nightmares, and the awful fall of the nightly red curtain, all without my beloved Photoshop and scarcely dA. No time for art this week. I doubt it will slow for awhile to keep my temperament in the right heel. Thank God for sex.

Have been squeezing in some time to get DD's chosen for you guys to eat up. Today is more work, but packing, too. Hollywood awaits and I'll be kissing it's sweetly laced lips for just under a week come tomorrow. A beautiful Rox will be at my side. I shall shoot it all with our Canon, and soak up the rest for future writings. Very excited, but a little nervous, too.

Hopefully I'll get the missing grey-matter all shoved back in before the beautiful onslaught. My hands hurt, bones.... knuckles, skin nicked and cut. Sore knees and a back that's been folded three times over and hung on a rack to dry. I heal quickly. VERY quickly. I'll be fine by later in the day. Probably will have barely a cut left.

Wish it was the old days. A bottle of Vodka sounds good right about now.
I don't drink anymore, gratefully.

She Wants Revenge is blaring. My love lays asleep, dreaming of far away things.
I want to write-write, but there's no time. The novel will have to wait. Again.

My dA friends: you guys are the coolest. I don't need a brain to know that. It just is. Pre-programmed and on auto-pilot. Go grab your day by the hair and drag it around for me, since I can't. Tell it it's for Jesse, and then hurl it against the wall so it does what you want. It'll behave. Always does.

I have to go race through my collection to get you guys some features to drool over. I'm drooling, but it's because I haven't shoved my brain in yet. Random, Random.

The next line was already here. If it's out of context, voice, or mood... that's why.

Now go fave some features, yo!

Be Seeing You,
-Jesse (AHiL)
:skullbones::heart::skullbones:



</blockquote>








Pipedreams II WS by Casperium

Where Snowflakes Are Born by vladstudio :thumb105703365:

Simple Po Christmas II by PoSmedley Merry Christmas II Widescreen by DigitalPhenom

Vinera by EAMejia :thumb105122940:

Web Junkies 2 by akiwi :thumb54879462:

grey by D-u-D The Dopeshow by NKeo

Autumn Flowers by SARETTA1 :thumb105157501:

Alien Blue Edition by Alexander-GG Dolph_wide by relhom









Moonlight Wallpaper Pack by Obi-S4n Black and Blue by cocacolagirlie

crystals by gbrgraphix Dream by Day WP by solefield

:thumb104535289: Injured by Unpredictableamateur

Last Light by vhm-cain :thumb102888661:

:thumb105104105: Folded Paper by skeletorfw

My Surreal World by RavenxCorpse iced... by mayoofka

Streamlines by Wolfoe Evil Slime-Wallpaper pack by Torched7








- I SUPPORT -

FallenRox stamp by KariAnnLax
:thumb68486910:
:thumb51370305:



I fav without commenting by BandaidPorn


:skullbones::skullbones::skullbones::skullbones::skullbones::skullbones::skullbones:

- ABOUT ME -

allhopeislost stamp by Thiefoworld
AHiL stamp by Roxcessories
I Use AHiL Wallpapers by splintered13


:flame:AHiL Supporters
- KariAnnLax
- splintered13
- mrrste
- HuGo07
- OtisBee
- damien-c
- l8
- LawrenceDeDark
- Crazyflashanimator
- CapMoreno
- MysticGenius
- rebstile
- Marker-Guru


:+favlove:Clubs
- VampyreArmy
- DeskModders


:ufo:My Top Deviations
- Anti-Theft Card PSD
- Retro Xplod, 1920 Preview
- AHiL - Varied Glass

:+fav:Collaborative Works
The following packs are joint efforts made by me for GUI Kits created by other artists here at dA. I'd like to note, that both GUI Themes were awarded DD's, as was the Revlover WP pack on it's own.


Made for Revolver by smoovie

Made for Ag SiO GUI-kit by DeskModders


Other deviantART Accounts

:iconthe-ahil-paradox:
The-AHiL-Paradox

:icondarkitexture:
darkiTexture

  • Watching: Unkown Artists

Something I've been meaning to say.

Journal Entry: Tue Dec 2, 2008, 8:08 PM
:iconthe-ahil-paradox:







:hypermind: ‹‹Take a Minute & Get Included››
>>>>~--~-- |An Unusual Half-Rant... Kinda| --~--~<<<<

››››››››››››››It must be difficult to fall into one style, become known for it, and then feel obligated to appease the needs of those who've come to have expectations for you. I find myself feeling very lucky that I like all sorts of things, instead of just one or two. Part of that, I'm sure, is because I get bored very easily. There's more, but I think you'll take away those parts as we move on without my having to say them.

There's just no way I could keep making the same style again and again. I see this in other areas, too. Skins, Photomanipulation, Drawing. Photography has it a little easier... at least they can argue that their art is limited to what they can see. Still... maybe they could try snapping a picture while shooting their camera with a shotgun. Or hurling it into the grill of a semi. Now that would be deviously different.

Anyway, I feel the same about this, after a while, as I do about trends.

I can't begin to tell you how bothersome I find it to be scouring the galleries for the next-best-thing and all I come across are Vista Logos, Apple logos, Microsoft/Apple-wannabe "standard" clones. Egads, people. And these days I can scarcely imagine what it'll be like when Windows 7 is in everyone's faces.
Let's put those in the same barrel with all the other "genre" stuff. Twisty, vectored-out, white streaky lights that neatly gradient over---oh! what color? BLUE! Shit. I wouldn't have thought of that. Same with that phase earlier in the year of "vector" labeled circle brushes all piled together over the brightest color canvas ever.
I'm sure you guys can think of even more than these. You've been here longer.

As it is, I'm not trying to be elitist here---and I'm being totally forgiving of n00bz trying to emulate the things they're just now discovering (you guys rule, keep it up---but pay attention, too).
Partly I'm bothered by these because it seems like people aren't challenging themselves enough, giving themselves enough room for variety, and most importantly: It feels like there's no one taking risks anymore.
Thus our gallery begins to look like someone put an old VHS tape in, held pause and rewind at the same time, then banged the thing onto fast-forward... inevitably blowing the wad of tape out everywhere.

So it becomes that when I'm able to find something DD-worthy, I'm very excited. That said, I about pee myself when I even see someone with the slightest potential to be different.

To be Different, I say again and again. To be Different.

Ah, and here we are. The point.
While this seems like a rant of sorts (and in a tiny way perhaps it is), the actual reason for offering this up to you is to give you some words of encouragement through the puddle of gloom, and say:

That could be you. That could be you, who is striving to be set apart from the rest.

You could be the person out there making a difference with your art. And your art can be making a difference in someone else's life. Challenging them to find some new way to approach the things they think, hear, touch, smell, taste, and see.

Did you know your art can do that?
It can.

Even something that seems so simple as a "Wallpaper" can make a difference. It makes a difference to me, and it'll make a difference to whomever lays their eyes upon it. It does because that's what our genre is meant to do. Wallpapers are most certainly pretty decorations on our monitors, but they're also pure works of art that span infinite genres. They populate the numerous rooms of homes across the globe. They touch everyone, even if only for a glance.

If you agree with even a fragment of this, you should do yourself a favor and go open up your Art software of choice. Go dust off your tablet. Go pick up your camera. Go DO whatever it is you DO to make your wallpapers, and make something no one's ever seen before. Take a risk. A huge risk. Venture out of your comfort zone. Hell, hide it in your scraps if you have to... but for the love of sanity, find it within yourselves to Create something new.

Then come here show me. Or tell me. Or say it to someone else who you know will tell me. In fact, don't just tell me, tell everyone you know. I bet they'll listen.
If you're doing it already, awesome!!! Link it here so others can see your stuff, and so I may revel in your pure, creative genius.

And in the meantime: Love your walls, boys and girls.
Love your art.

-Jesse (AHiL)</i>
:skullbones::heart::skullbones:










  • Watching: Unkown Artists

Feeeeeaaaaatttuuuuurrrressssss

Journal Entry: Tue Nov 25, 2008, 11:42 AM
:iconthe-ahil-paradox:







:hypermind: ‹‹Wallpaper Wizardry››
>>>>~--~-- |:faint:| --~--~<<<<


Fuck:. 1680x1050 by kuzzeyesedsoe
Terra by Funerium Autumn comes WP version by Ioneek
Light Symphonia 13 by love1008 Last Light by vhm-cain

Mature Content

60546 Wallpaper by kubicki
Bad Passion for Retrofukation by j3concepts
:thumb104006198: BigFieryKillGun by kuzzeyesedsoe

LVSD by endemo Full Metal by burnsplayguitar
Brushed Steel? Grey Lines? by skeletorfw Ohhwell Bokeh by LunaticKio
Beyond This Place. by jugga-lizzle Wake Up Feather Black by AndreaAndrade
I Dream of Falling by JoshDykgraaf
un.flower.wp by azazyl Listen to the Music-Wallpaper by Sugargrl14

:thumb103270367: TransparentWalls by eos8

Mature Content

Wonderlost: The Duchess WP by xanthic
Typographic Rain by vladstudio
Mechanical Firedrake by JoshDykgraaf Under Construction by deviantdark
Metalicious_wide by relhom
Little Kingdom II by zilla774 TRAVEL CS ANGEL by petercui

Reload Wallpaper by timshinn73 The Patriotic Storm Trooper by moonphantom
Slump Buster by Steven-Becker Inside My Broken Heart by tsims533
The A Construction by Sha-X-doW feeling time by pincel3d
:thumb102091232: Starfields - Heather by skeletorfw
CityCentre by love1008 Desillusion by Brigitte-Fredensborg

Christmas Wallpaper by arrsistable :thumb98776504:
Praedestinatio by TobiasRoetsch Eagles Become Vultures by axcy
I Can't Swim - Wallpaper Pack by mauricioestrella :thumb100121278:
Another Wood Wallpaper V2 by Baio999 ext1_1 by VisionsofArt
Flow v.3 by nuaHs













  • Watching: Unkown Artists